Even when the grey skies loom, the bold and beautiful reaches up as if to kiss the clouds better. Emerging, like a yellow splash of joy, silently clamouring to crown a day I was almost trying to forget.
This little baby sunflower I planted so many months ago has defied all odds to choose today, of all days, to sprinkle its gently glorious hope for life. On this morning in Cornwall in which I first awoke feeling rather disheartened.
I’m realising it’s 6 months to the day since my first symptoms appeared when covid rolled through my life like an uninvited storm cloud whose aftermath so stubbornly remains. For me, as with so many.
I imagined by now I would have been able to cartwheel through a whole field of sunflowers – looking back delightedly as I danced and twirled on the shadow of this unpredictable virus. Yet here it still lingers, dictating a different order of play. Here it still hangs, forcing me to stop and change and accept a far slower recovering of that life I so wish to retrieve.
But, now, also here, out of nowhere, my baby sunflower has appeared – with the most perfect timing in the world. Just when I thought those seeds had missed their chance to grow. When I’d so ineptly planted too many in one pot and then feared I’d scuppered their little lives. Yet still they rise. From ruin to restoration. From isolation to fertile solitude – and beyond.
Beholden, my eyes move away from those clouds to rest in awe on that bewildering yellow. Away from that imagined field into the bare and uplifting precious bloom of now. Breathing in that tiny golden light that illuminates a delicate strength that warms and opens – and softens me.
I can so clearly see how that baby sunflower’s struggle in time has still so gracefully birthed its growth. I can so clearly see how time may not always feel of my own choosing – but that time will somehow know exactly when that time is right.
And, yes, I can also so clearly see – and have faith – that we shall all simply bloom when we are all good and ready. With unexpectedly perfect timing. And, with our very own yellow – ready to rise and shine ?